Is it just teeth? Teething comfort and trusting your instinct

Adaeze's baby had been chewing everything in sight for a week: her fist, the edge of the blanket, her mother's chin. Her cheeks were pink, her vest was soaked with dribble, and every relative had the same verdict: it's her teeth. Then one evening she felt hotter than usual and would not feed, and something in Adaeze said, this is different. She rang the out-of-hours service. It turned out to be an ear infection, easily treated, and she was glad she had asked.

Teething is real, and it can make babies miserable. But it is also blamed for a lot it does not cause. Learning the difference, and learning to trust that inner nudge, is one of the quiet skills of the first year.

When teeth usually come

Many babies get their first tooth somewhere around 6 months, though it varies a lot: some start much earlier, a few are even born with a tooth, and some have no teeth until after their first birthday. The bottom front teeth often come first, followed by the top front teeth. Most children have all their first teeth by around two and a half years.

Common signs of teething

• Sore, red or swollen gums where a tooth is coming through.
• A flushed cheek on one side.
• More dribbling than usual, sometimes with a rash on the chin.
• Chewing and gnawing on fingers and toys.
• Being more fretful or clingy, and sleeping less well for a few days.
• Rubbing an ear on the same side as the tooth.

What teething does not usually cause

Teething may cause a slight rise in temperature, but it is not a known cause of a high fever, and it should not make a baby seriously unwell. If your baby has a temperature of 38°C or higher, diarrhoea, vomiting or a rash on the body, is not feeding, or seems poorly, do not put it down to teeth. Treat it as you would any illness and get advice.

Gentle ways to comfort a teething baby

• Something to chew. A teething ring cooled in the fridge, not the freezer, can soothe sore gums. Follow the instructions that come with it.
• A clean finger. Gently rubbing the gum with a clean finger can help.
• Cool foods, if your baby has started solids, such as chilled soft fruit or cooked vegetables cut to a safe size, with you watching closely. Avoid sugary teething biscuits.
• Wipe away dribble gently and often to protect the skin on the chin and neck.
• Extra cuddles and distraction. A walk, a song, a change of room.
• Ask before using gels or medicines. Speak to a pharmacist or doctor before using any teething gel or pain relief, as not every product is suitable for babies.

Please avoid amber or other teething necklaces, bracelets and anklets. They are a choking and strangulation risk, and there is no good evidence that they help.

Caring for those new teeth

As soon as the first tooth appears, start brushing twice a day with a soft baby toothbrush and a smear of fluoride toothpaste. Avoid letting your baby fall asleep with a bottle of milk or juice, and register with a dentist when you can.

Trusting your instinct

You spend more time with your baby than anyone else. You know their usual cry, their usual colour, their usual appetite. When something feels different, that is information worth acting on. Instinct is not a replacement for medical advice; it is your signal to seek it.

• If your baby seems unusually unwell, ring your doctor or an urgent advice line.
• If your baby has difficulty breathing, is floppy or hard to wake, has a rash that does not fade under a glass, or has a fit, call your emergency number or go to the emergency department.
• If you have been reassured but things are getting worse, call again. Babies change, and it is right to have them looked at again.

Asking for wisdom is something Scripture encourages: “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him” (James 1:5). God does not scold you for asking. Neither should a good nurse or doctor. Ask Him for wisdom, and ask the professionals for help. Both are good gifts.

A prayer for discernment

Lord, give me wisdom to know my baby's needs, and soothe their sore gums and fretful nights. Sharpen my instinct, quiet my fear, and help me act quickly when something is not right. Thank You that You never scold me for asking. Amen.