Praying for your baby, trimester by trimester

You can pray for someone you have never met. Mums do it every day, often without words: a hand resting on the bump while waiting for the kettle, a sigh in the scan room, a whispered please at night. If you would like a little more shape to those prayers, here is a simple guide that follows your pregnancy from the first weeks to the last.

Use it however suits you. Pray one line a day, or pick one focus for a whole week. There is no wrong way to pray for your child.

The first trimester (weeks 1 to 13)

These are the hidden weeks. From the outside very little shows, yet inside, your baby's heart, brain, spine and limbs are forming. You may be exhausted, sick or anxious, and many people around you may not know yet.

Prayer focuses:

• Formation. Ask God to knit your baby together well, every cell and every system.
• Your body. Pray for strength through tiredness and sickness, and for wisdom to rest.
• Peace in the unknown. Bring worries about early weeks honestly to God.
• Your care team. Pray for the midwife or doctor you will meet at booking.

The psalmist marvelled that God was present before anyone else could see:

For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb. (Psalm 139:13)

The old word covered here carries the sense of woven or sheltered. Even in the weeks when you cannot see or feel anything, your baby is not unseen.

The second trimester (weeks 14 to 27)

For many mums, energy returns a little. Your bump begins to show, and somewhere in these weeks you may feel the first flutters. There is often a detailed scan around the middle of pregnancy.

Prayer focuses:

• Growth and senses. Your baby is beginning to hear sounds. Pray that the first voices they know will be loving ones.
• Scans and results. Pray before appointments for calm, clear communication and courage to ask questions.
• Your relationships. Pray for your marriage or partnership, your family and friends who will surround your child.
• Character. Begin praying for the person your child will become: kind, brave, honest, loved.

Try this: each time you feel a movement this trimester, let it be a prompt for a one-line prayer. Thank you, Lord. Keep them.

The third trimester (weeks 28 to birth)

Your baby is gaining weight and practising for life outside: breathing movements, sucking, opening their eyes. You may be heavier, slower and thinking more and more about birth.

Prayer focuses:

• Movements. Thank God for each kick and stretch. And as part of caring for your baby, if movements slow down or change, call your midwife or maternity unit straight away rather than waiting.
• Position and readiness. Pray for your baby to grow well and for your body to prepare for birth.
• Labour and birth. Pray for the people who will be with you, for wise decisions and for peace whatever turns the day takes.
• The first weeks at home. Pray for rest, help, feeding and the gentle start of family life.

Prayers for any week

Some prayers fit every season. Keep this short list somewhere you will see it:

1. That your baby will know they are loved by God and by you.
2. For health and safety for you both.
3. For wisdom for everyone caring for you.
4. For your own heart: joy, patience and courage.
5. For other mums you know who are waiting, grieving or struggling.

When praying feels hard

If you have lost a baby before, praying for this one may feel frightening, as if hope itself were risky. If you are unwell, tired or low, you may not have words at all. That is all right. You can simply rest your hand on your bump and say your baby's name, or Lord, you know. God hears the prayers we cannot finish.

And prayer goes hand in hand with good care. Keep your appointments, call your midwife or doctor about anything that worries you, and let praying and practical care sit side by side.

A small idea to keep

Some mums write a short prayer each week in a notebook or the notes on their phone. One day it can become a gift to their child: a record that they were prayed for before they were born.

A prayer for my baby today

Lord, you see my baby in places I cannot. Knit this little one together with care, guard their growth and give me strength for today. Let them grow up knowing they were loved before they were born. Amen.